How I Lived
by flamma09
Summary: I was born the day you kissed me. And I died inside the night you left me. And I lived, oh, how I lived... while you loved me. Takari
1. Cherry Blossoms

**Okay, so this is my first Digimon fanfic so please be nice. Sorry if it's a little bit cheesy in the first part. Enjoy!**

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It was rare. This moment was very rare for them. Sitting snugly under a cherry blossom tree as soft, pink petals danced around them. This moment was very rare for them because they didn't have to listen to Yolei's ranting or Davis' constant flirting attempts with Kari, and they didn't have to be in the midst of their older friends. It was just the two of them. They didn't need anyone else's company. They _were_ their own company.

Free from the hustle and bustle of city life, they enjoyed the autumn air as they fell into silence. The kind of silence that felt serene, calm, and relaxing. The kind that makes you smile for a reason you know not of. The one that lets you know that even when you are in someone's presence, no words need to be said. This is the kind of silence that fell upon two youngsters...Kari and T.K.

The young blonde snatched a side glance from his seatmate. Heat found its way to his cheeks, accompanied by a pink tint. He looked at her, Kari Kamiya, once again. This time with more courage and eagerness. The gentle wind blew through her short, brown hair, hitting her face in the process. Petals, falling at five centimeters per second, swerved around the brown-eyed girl. T.K. quickly looked away, pretending to be looking at a rock as soon as Kari's gaze met his. The brunette softly smiled and suppressed a giggle. After the blue-eyed digidestined recovered from his flushed state, he steeled himself and looked at the Child of Light. After moments of feeling a hole burning at side of her head, she turned to her friend and looked him in the eye. He blushed a little but he didn't look away, unlike the other time. He could see his own image swimming in her brown eyes for a valuable thing that would tell if she loved him, the same way he loved her. And like a diver finding the shiniest pearl, he found it. And he smiled. And so did she, knowing full well what that heart-stopping smile meant.

"Kari," he began, "I-I-I love you, you should know that."

"I love you, too, forever and always." In her eyes was an explosion of emotion. He can tell that she has never felt like this her whole life.

"I promise I'll never hurt you, because seeing you happy makes me the happiest person alive." They say promises were meant to be broken. But T.K. always keeps his promises. This one promise he vowed to keep, he'll break laws and push the limits just to keep it. His head edged closer as he attempted to plant a small peck on her lips. And ever so slowly, the blonde closed his eyes when his lips travel distance was few centimeters away. And his eyes flew open once again when Kari pushed her jaw forward in an attempt to kiss him.

"Ow," they whined simultaneously, T.K. clutching his nose and Kari adjusting her jaw.

"Well, that was a lame attempt for a first kiss," the Child of Hope commented, "but how about this?" He questioned before placing his lips on her cheek.

"That'll do for a first kiss," she replied.

"...for now," he added, smirking.

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**BEHOLD THE CHEEZINESS!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! REVIEW! Oh and yeah, this is gonna be a multi-chapter/part story...so...yeah. In the next chapter/part, we go to the FUTURE!!! *echoes*So...yeah. Bye. And don't forget...**

**!!!!!!!REVIEW!!!!!!!**


	2. Here Comes Goodbye

**Okay, so here is the second part/chapter. They are a bit older now. Hope you enjoy!**

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**~~~Here Comes Goodbye~~~**

_I can hear the truck tires coming up the gravel road  
And its not like her to drive that slow, nothing's on her radio  
Footsteps on the front porch, I hear my doorbell  
She usually comes right in, now I can tell_

In my usually bubbly mood, I walked to the window and saw a car coming into view. I squinted so I can see the plate number. Kari. Wait, that's odd. Kari's driving like my grandma, and grandma's speed is always less than half the speed limit. I sat on my bed waiting for her to barge in like always. Slow, dragging footsteps preceded by a soft thud. This is getting really odd. Kari's _never_ like this. So depressed and all. I am now wondering what could be eating her that makes her that way.

_DING DONG!_

Well, that's really odd. She never really rings the doorbell. Something has got to be up. I quickly ran down the stairs and up to the door. I opened the door revealing my twenty-one year old brunette best friend. I scanned her from her feet upward. I stopped when I saw that look in her eye. She was smiling, but here eyes are telling me otherwise.

_Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time  
Here comes the start of every sleepless night  
The first of every tear I'm gonna cry  
Here comes the pain, Here comes me wishing things had never changed  
And she was right here in my arms tonight, but here comes goodbye  
_

I have never seen that look before. In concern, I quested for the meaning of that look. I pulled her inside and looked at her intently. "Kari? Kari, what's wrong?"

"T.K.," she took a deep breath, "I'm getting married."

All time stopped as she said those words. It was like I was frozen, even though everyone around me was moving. I felt trapped. Trapped in a sea of emotions. Trapped, and now I'm drowning. Drowning into a more familiar sea of sadness. I blinked a few times when tears formed in my eyes. I forced a smile to play on my lips and a laugh to escape my throat, pretending to be happy for her. And I was glad that she bought it. She rolled her eyes and scoffed at me when I replied. "No way!"

"Why can't you just accept that a guy could actually love me enough to marry me?" And when she said that, even though she was meaning for it to be a joke, my smile shattered along with my world. Through all the years we spent together, has she really not noticed? Has she not noticed that the guy who could actually love her enough to marry her was me? I loved her all these years, but how could she not know? Without thinking, I pronounced a few words that I hope would be enough to express my answer; enough to turn things around before they're too late.

"I would love you enough to marry you." Her face was unreadable. It's like she was confused, shocked, sad, and unbelieving all at the same time. Her breathing was heavy. For a moment, she forgot how to speak.

"T.K.--"

"Well, you wouldn't want to keep your fiance waiting." I replied in a way that was out of nature. Tears came to both our eyes. She made her way to the front door and exited after whispering a sad, sincere "sorry". How could I have known that the reason for the tears in her eyes earlier was me?

_I can hear her say I love you like it was yesterday  
And I can see it written on her face that she had never felt this way  
One day I thought Id see her with her daddy by her side  
And violins would play here comes the bride  
_

_Flashback_

_"I love you, too, forever and always." In her eyes was an explosion of emotion. He can tell, she has never felt like this her whole life._

_End Flashback_

I leaned against the door, shut my eyes and slid down to a sitting position on the floor. I threw my head back and saw a vision. An orchestra playing in the background. A priest, the back of a man in a tux, the back of an old man also in a tux, a woman wearing a flowing, white gown. The old man leaves the woman after walking down an aisle with her. The younger man truned around but I couldn't quite make out his face. He welcomed the woman with his arm, offering a place for her own arm to fit right through. Thorugh the man's eyes, I could see the girl. _Kari_. And through Kari's eyes, I could see the man. Russel. Her fiance. The people were too absorbed in the scene to even care about the man standing at the last pew of the church. He opened the church doors and looked back, shooting a desperate look, hoping it was enough of a farewell. I could see him now. He was me. And I shut the door, along with my heart.

_Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time  
Here comes the start of every sleepless night  
The first of every tear I'm gonna cry  
Here comes the pain, Here comes me wishing things had never changed  
And she was right here in my arms tonight, but here comes goodbye_

_Why's it have to go from good to gone? Before the lights turn on Yeah, and you're left alone Oh, but here comes goodbye_

My eyes flew open. A tear escpaed my eye. And when I closed my eyes again, pictures ran through my head. One stopped. It was me and Kari, under the cherry blossom tree. The next one came into view. It was an old wilting tree. Perched under the tree, cold and alone, was a man. I couldn't believe it. Blonde hair, blue eyes. No, it can't be. He...was..._me._

_Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time  
Here comes the start of every sleepless night  
The first of every tear I'm gonna cry  
Here comes the pain, Here comes me wishing things had never changed  
And she was right here in my arms tonight, but here comes goodbye_

Tears clouded my eyes as some of them rolled down my cheeks. I never wanted this to happen. Why am I always left behind by the people I love most. Why do I always get left behind by the _person_ I love most. But what can I do? I promised I'd never hurt her. By separating her from what she wants, I would hurt her. But if I let myself deal with it, I'll hurt myself. What else can I do but say goodbye?

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**Aaw...you know, I was so depressed while writing this. Yes, it is sad, but everything will start sprouting from here. So, what'd you think? Tell me! In review form! Just go press that silly little green button right there. Go on. You can do it. Press it. Go press it, now! JUST PRESS IT, ALREADY!!!!!!**


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